A woman or a man goes to a show, dinner, or a movie alone and it's a problem or maybe she/he is lonely. What’s wrong with having some space and just chilling by yourself?
Sometimes, I love going places alone because I meet new people and most of the time I have more fun than going out with someone I know. I love vacationing alone, going to dinner alone, going to the movies ALONE and I'm never LONELY. I have plenty of family and true friends that love me. I make sure they are never left out of the experience because I share every detail with them and my journal. I still can’t figure out what the problem is.
Even in a relationship he always thinks I'm going out to meet someone and as usual my cell blows up with messages and questions of my whereabouts. My reply is always something like, “Come on dude I’m dating you not tattooed on you. If I want to cheat I can do that in the comfort of my own home and who’s gonna stop me?” End of discussion! All I want is sometimes, just sometimes to be left alone to enjoy my life. Am I so wrong or is it the world that’s got it twisted?
When I go out alone some people, except the one's I meet, are making it seem as if it's some form of a mental condition that needs some medical attention. My cousin once said to me, “Ende ere ebakeshen tetamemyalesh bechenet tiru aydelem”. I think she meant “berd tiru aydelem” but then it was summer time. Well….science has it hanging out with folks with that type of mentality is hazardous to my health. Don’t misconstrue my bluntness for anger.
I'm never alone or bored because I'm always with my favorite company (me, myself, and I) and we laugh at anything and everything we just don't hold Q&A sessions.
Published by October 4th, 2006 in Dating and Social.
well,i guess that you have achieved the hardest thing ever:wholeness with yourself. if you feel comforatable with yourself, found peace with yourself, settled with yourself then i think you are not alone. the bible also says, it is alright to be single but not alright to be alone.
Ha ha ha ha,
Celebrate Life bakishen ehen fara balishine telesh wede ne neyi… I promise I’ll never call you…
seriously though, i love alone time.. ye life negerochene mamChomChom..
Just like that some people want to spend some of their time alone and there is nothing wrong with it, rather it is very important. But if it is too much it might raise a question and somebody?s attention like your cousin?s and those who cares about you and it is a natural thing to worry about someone you love. For you, there is nothing to worry about and I believe that. But, when you spend a lot of time with your self, talk to yourself and laugh with yourself, you will miss the different perception and perspective of others (a friend) which gives you a hell lot of view and depth of life, the joy of sharing, the importance of communicating, the love of a friend?and the chance of being there for a friend. I don?t believe on making everybody a friend either. But having a few friends you like and respect, a couple of them you love is being blessed.
Sounds like you man doesnt give you the space you need? sqelidish nuew!
but what’s up with abesha males these days, how come they are so beGid, do you know what i mean?
CelebrateLife….I totally agree. Ain’t nothing wrong with some alone time. I’m a wife-mom-daughter-friend-sis etc etc. – I love and adore all that are in my life, but man, sometimes, I just need time to be by myself with just my thoughts. My husband is very supportive and totally gives me my space when I need it.
Unfortunately, many people (particularly those who come from a closely-knit family) assume if you are alone, you must be lonely.
If you are single, alone time is definitely a no-no, and if you are in a committed relationship, you get barraged with questions like, hulu neger selam new? Or betena new? But hey, as long as the person is comfortable in their own skin, who give a damn what other people say?
Alone!
Being alone is a state of ecstasy
Being alone is a quiet orgasm
Being alone is like the sound of silence
Being alone is making one side of the bed
I don?t want anyone to misunderstand when I stated I want to be alone. I LOVE to socialize and my friends can attest to that. When I?m with others I?m there 100% because I want to be there but sometimes, I stress *sometimes* there is no experience like alone time to just take in life (my life).
There is nothing like going to the movies alone, I don?t care what anyone says, you don?t have anyone talking about ?did you see that?? then I feel like saying ?no what happened?? duh!
Kirubel, I?m glad you understand and validated it with a quote from the bible.
Nolawi, You are just too cute for words and I?m glad you understand the need for some alone time.
Cyberme, I know what you mean about too much alone time and it will raise more than questions. I really think, in my cousin?s case, she just wants to be there and not just here about it. Believe me I spend way too much time with people way too much time I tell you. BTW I don?t talk with myself, I added that to try and make my point, I think that?s something a little more serious than just alone time.
Rebecca, Well I also don?t want too much space from him either, just sometimes but he?s not ethio and even if he was a man is a man therefore he?ll act like a man (does that sound right?)
Timo, You?re the bomb.com I feel you girl who gives a damn!
Your Abesha sister
Taina, Haaaaachoooo “Being alone allows you to explore your innerself.” That felt good where’s the tissue?
celebratelife
The two most significant events in life are done alone,we are born alone unless one is a twin, and we die alone as in the actual event happens only to the dying person however much loved ones like to think they would swap places if they could.
Time alone could also be the time writers take to write, athletes to practise, artist to paint, musicians to compose, wise men and women to think wise things and a shopper to shop until they drop. All things that give you your own personal space and time and what to do with it. Being lonely is just bad.
yea…as i said..i think having a quite time with yourself is very important. There are a lot of times you need to stop and think in life and take times with yourself. If you are taking *some* of your time to be with yourself and you are comfortable with it, then it is not an issue. but if loneliness is to the extent that most people advice the need of medical attention ?.that could be an issue. And still if you are very much comfortable with it?who else could tell you what is best for you.
celebrate life, sis! don’t mind nobody – nothing like going to the movies alone.
I was just talking about this topic today with someone. I envy people who are capable of going it alone, but I – am not that girl.
Atta girl! ain’t it liberating to do whatever you fancy? cos truth be told, how many hours of awake time do we get to have sometime alone when we are not at work, with people, or at school, with people, and at times, with phones ringing off the hook even when we’re at home? Good for you Celeb.! for doing what’s good for YOU.
S, C and Temelkach, I love the high 5′s and the understanding.
Especially when you’re in a relationship you have to take at least 1 day, every so often, to just sit back or go for a long drive.
Celebrate : I was like you . Honestly I couldnt wait for the time to be alone , “my time ” I used to call it … but then something happened and I stopped socializing more . The demanding rountines of family life and friends stopped . So I was happy – finally I said , I could have more time for my self. So a month passed two , I had a choice of socializing , but the more i styed by my self , the more I enjoyed it. The more I enjoyed it , the furthur I stayed away from people. So its been a couple of months now, almost a year – I am seeing more and more further away from friends and family . I have them around , its not like I cant see them.
Moral of the story , alone time can be enjoyed when you have a busy schedule or you are always in the middle of family and friend circles. If you start it as an enjoyment … you might end up in a position you dont want to be in . So just handle this :high” you get from being alone with care .
A,Thanks for the candid advice. I think you’re preaching to the wrong choir. Being lonely is not what I aspire to be, although I very much enjoy my alone time. Thanks again for prewarning me of what could happen….I do value and look forward to the “me” time whenever I can get it. Thanks again.
wow…there are times i enjoy doing by myself and meet other ppl…one of the best thing i did as ‘alone’ traveled throught the state and europe…man! nothing like it…u cruze meet new ppl every where u go…chat and enjoy it….go to the park and read….do skating…movie…i even go out to a nice resturant….dressed order my food and enjoy it…sipping my wine….specially now a days i kind of not like going to movie with others…anyways we do not talk in the movie….
Celebrate
nice one! Some of the things I love doing ‘alone’ include: shopping, eating out, and going to spas. But have you wondered why abesha restaurants don’t make setoch comfortable to do so?
Blenmark, Thanks for sharing. I have yet to do that, travel to Europe alone. Actually my sis (my travel partner) and I are going to Germany spring 2007 and when I’m with her we can totally stay out of each other’s way. Girl I’m brushing up on my German…so far I got guten tag down. I admire your courage. You’ve inspired me. I’ll start with Canada alone and graduate to Europe.
Wudnesh, I can live in a spa and I heard they have the best of the best spas in Arizona. Our culture interprets alone time as being lonely or a sign of trouble, which is really sad. I’m also thinking they see a girl out to dinner or a bar alone as an undercover working girl. I would love to go to an Ethiopian restaurant and enjoy my meal and a show but it won’t happen any time soon. I love my Ethiopians though.
I am only feel alone when I go to the bathroom.
I feel lonely when I pay my Pair of shoes.cuz that is dummm expensive. if i have a guy he will pay for it…
… and if you have a guy … err … what is it that he’ll help you with in the bathroom?
confused.
“The WC is the only place where a man can be free” I don´t remember who said that, now I wonder whether it is an alone time or a lonlely one enjoyed in the four walls of the WC or yeinToTo or yekebena CHaka, ye yeka mikael washa, a shade behind a monument in a cemetary, behind yesensel aTer….
Except for fraternal twins, the others start their exsitence from single cell and go to a four limbed individual (with a lonlely brain) that squeals (wheteher it is due to pleasure or disgust is debatable) its way out of its confinement. I guess it is no wonder that we tend to either mix or shun crowd wheneever we feel like it. I personally don´t believe that man is a social animal as ants, bees, wasps and others. Man´s social behaviour, including the altruists or the philantrophes of the world, is always used to serving the individual. “Alone” time is then the time used to freely excercise our innate behaviour, whereas lonely is something that comes when we fail to assume the social behaviour to our benefit. Cynical, maybe but I think it is true.
Celeb, use your alone time for your contentment and don´t ever feel lonely, particularly when you are saying something even the deaf could hear, which I think you are capable of doing.