I met her about two years ago, when she joined some of my friends for drinks while I was on vacation. There was some chemistry or so I thought.
I left but couldn’t get her out of my mind, I contacted her from distant land casually and we talked every so often. The subject was generic, as she was very private.
Over the year, we became not friends but acquaintances, someone I knew well. I eventually moved closer and the acquaintance became stronger over half a year and I expressed my interest in dating her both informally and formally.
I was turned down, although the down was not so apparent. She could have been trying to spare my feeling or she was ethiofused as Nolawi as poetically put it a while back. I assumed the former. She was not interested in me, she never was.
This is when I made a choice either stay as friends or isolate myself from her. Again the former, I would stay as friends because I cared about her. She would talk to me about her casual relationships as I would more openly than she ever was. I understood she was private.
Over time I realized my feeling for her is not just a casual interest or lust but rather love.
I am in love with a woman friend of mine who doesn’t feel the same way. I am stuck in the F zone and I don’t know what to do.
Published by February 21st, 2008 in Dating, Personal and Social.
http://www.abesha.wordpress.com
Wondata,
I understand what you’re saying completely, and i feel your post.
This is a post i wrote and i must say it relates to what you’re going through in a way that it could help you in getting over it – and do it quickly. Here it goes.
=======================
Relationships Suck, Sometimes
Whatever happened to the days when relationships were celebrated, cherished, and appreciated? We don’t see those kind of relationships any longer.
People these days tend to like someone and hook up faster than a blink of an eye. Once they hook up, they run around and tell everyone they are head over heels for this guy or this girl.
That passion dies as fast as it came and the rest is easy. Both become bitchy, faulting each other and getting under each other’s skin. I can’t stand that.
Why do i bring it up? Because i can relate to it. Not in a sense that i am quick to jump in to it, but in my last relationship there are things i look back on and regret.
I love my ability to let go. As much i might be smitten, i can also control my mind in a way that only very few people can. Meaning – I can move on as fast as anyone i know. But that doesn’t mean i might not care about the person any longer.
I just tell my mind to get over it and i find ways or things that will help me do it faster. Be it reading philosophy books, or any other remedy.
When you love someone you can’t just love them in good times and not be supportive in bad times. A relationship is tested the most when your other half is going through something hard. You can’t say to your other half who is stressed and going through something – “you’re not the way you used to be, or something related to that”.
Of course, it’s hard to be happy-go-lucky person 24/7. And when you are together with someone for a long time, you don’t feel as if you have to hide your emotions or feelings. You expect them to be a shoulder to cry on. That doesn’t mean you are weak or you changed. Your other half at some point is your everything. And your everything should be someone who makes you feel at ease and not judge you for life’s bumps and challenges.
I certainly bend backwards for people in general and i do it even more for my other half, and i don’t know if my Ex did the same for me. I understand some of us are stronger than others. Some of us ride-or-die. And others simply don’t.
The sooner you realize and accept that the faster you get over hard break-ups.
In my case, i had to realize that and – accept it fast.
When you love someone their dream becomes yours as much as theirs.
My Ex, her dream was mine, but my dream wasn’t hers. Don’t read between the lines when i say that and start thinking that i wanted to get married or wanted to have kids and she didn’t. Not that kind of dream. Just the typical dream of achieving things in life and sharing each others goal as a common goal.
P.S. If you happen to read this and you’re my Ex, i wasn’t thinking about you neither am i hurt. I was just thinking about my life and the things i learned from shortcomings (in this case from your shortcomings). I am a better and brighter guy because of our break-up. Funny how things work out right? Whatever doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. But if you only knew that at the time.
===========================
That’s pretty much the whole post in its entirety. Hey,get over it and accept it fast. It will only help Wondata. Good luck my friend.
http://www.abesha.wordpress.com
Wondata, there is nothing you could do here other than moving on with your life. I say keep your distance away from this woman until you get over the love that you have for her. Then may be you can be friends or NOT afterwards. Of course, this is easy being said than done. Keep yourself busy and occupied with other things. May be pick up a new hobby, finish reading the book that you started last year, catch up with movies and TV shows……you get the gist. There are a lot of fish in the sea. Move the hell on is my advice to you.
elaboration requested:
How do you date a woman formally and informally? Could that be why she said no?
A woman does not easily change her mind and become sexually attracted to a man she has already placed in her friend zone. This is said to be very different from how a male’s mind works, and as a result leads to a string of false expectations on the part of the man. It is not impossible to get out of the friend zone as it is stated in many texts. In some cultures and societies, women keep around many possible suitors and marry the person they feel most comfortable with.
Many dating seminars and texts focus on how to avoid the friend zone, advising immediate cessation of all contact once a man finds himself in the friend zone.
[quote comment="130271"]elaboration requested:
How do you date a woman formally and informally? Could that be why she said no?[/quote]
I think he meant that he asked to date her formally and informally? not date her formally and informally..
basically get the ef away from her because the reason she keeps you around might be because she like the attention she receives from you,….
I agree with Nolawi. Women like getting attention, especially romantic attention, from men even if they are not interested in dating them. Or she just wants to be friends with you and is not guilty of wanting romantic attention.
The key is if she seems to somewhat encourage your romantic advances and then pushes you away, then watch out!!!!!!! But if she’s consistent in her actions, then don’t push away her friendship. That’s my two cent wondata
Ouch! Heart breaking! Most habesha’s women are untruthful with their own feelings and hard to tell what she’s upto. Good luck! I’m not sure you call this “love”, though.
[quote comment="130279"]
basically get the ef away from her because the reason she keeps you around might be because she like the attention she receives from you,….[/quote]
She may also be genuinely interested with his friendship.
I think Nolawi believes that the attention from a platonic guy friend is so essential to women existance.
Wondata,
Try to move on and you can’t do that if you are still friends with her. The more you spend time with her, the more she keeps saying no and the more you will want her…it’s a vicious cirle…It might be unfair to her because she might genuinely want your friendship, in that case take time to get over her then be her friend afterwards.
[quote comment="130297"]I think Nolawi believes that the attention from a platonic guy friend is so essential to women existance.[/quote]
You mean to tell me it’s not? Someone needs to send out a broadcast message to all the chica’s who put a platonic d*ck on layaway. Thank you for letting us know KT
why put it on layaway when you were offered to have it for FREE
this is so funny..i just read people responds and pretty much all of them are different. Wondata, let me know which advice you choose.
already much said about it…F zone is not fun at all
I say Make up your mind…and choose one!!!!
[quote comment="130317"]why put it on layaway when you were offered to have it for FREE[/quote]
If you’re not taking it at the price of FREE then you are laying IT away in case of emergency.
There should be a bill in congress to protect the platonic d*ick from misuse
Wondata, everyone of us may say something from our understanding of the situation, but only YOU know how close you guys are, how she’d react etc. (which we, the readers,cannot consider). Besides, every person is different….I don’t believe in “A Man’s Perspective”…”A Woman’s Perspective” minamin. None of my friends think alike. But hopefully, you can get something out of what each one of us say to help you move on with your life.
Personally, I can never date a friend no matter how nice or even perfect match he may be. I do believe in a relationship built on friendship. However, I must not have started out with the person as ‘friends’ first. Once I decide he is my friend, that’s what he’ll be for life. TO ME, dating my friend is unthinkable. (Not that I think of friends dating as something bad – it’s just that something I cannot do…..in the same way that I cannot date member of my family….yea, my friends are like brothers…and sisters to me). Having said that, I know of a friend who turned her friend down….and decided to give him a chance after a year (mind you, it was after she got hurt by her ex and thought ‘why not give a nice person a chance’ )
Good luck!
and if the girl wants the F-thing because she’s not up for getting him tangled up in her panties?
Wondata,
You should slowly create a distance and stay away from the zone. It will give both of you a clear head (should her thinking be clouded by the attention, as it OFTEN happen to us). This closeness can’t be good for you…. you might end up resenting her. Stay away and let time do the rest
Wondata, does this woman know you are in love with her? I understand you said you asked her to date you before but wanting to date someone isnt the same as loving them, well at least not at the beginning. You must love her a lot if you are willing to listen to her going on about her casual relationships, dont stay too long in that F zone by all accounts it sounds a lonely corner, I dont know what to advice you except to say this try with her again and if she still doesnt feel the same, file her somewher in your mind under the bracket of “unnatainable” and try to move on however difficult it might be. Good luck
She aleady turned you down so you can be friends with her if you can stand it or move on. Don’t spend too much time with her or around her if you have strong feeling for her (you said love) cut your losses and move on is my thought….Are you dating others or going out and not just thinking or obessing over her….this will help you to move on
Listen to Wudnesh ,its a very wise way of putting it.
All of us have our own interpretations of relationships. I always tell people with relationship issues one thing. DO what every makes you happy with out hurting the other person.
If staying in love with her makes you more happy you don’t need to change anything.
I don’t think you have to do things the mainstream way of black or white. I have been in a very complicated relationship ,I have been trying to make the best out of it cause I get a lot of satisfaction.
Gist of the comment, try to see what makes you happy and stick with it no matter how weird it is.
I agree with GrandMa, you may feel that it’s love but unless it’s reciprocated i don’t think u can really call it Love. try talking it thru with her, if you like her this much (and she likes u back even as a friend) she should be able to understand and maybe then you can move on, don’t just imply things, hard as it is for the guys to understand this, guys and girls have kinda different ways of implying things so it could mean it’s just miscommunications, i.e. she may not have understood you in the first place … but it’s a difficult situation bro, ayzon
comment 20 & 15 is crazy .. this girl gets his attention and love without reciprocating it…
he should stay away from her till he gets over her…
Nolawi,
That’s only a temporary solution, or not a solution at all. avoiding facing it never helps, i say deal with it, and talk as in really TALK. and you’e the only one who can be the judge of how to handle the whole situation wondata, but from a bit of experience… putting it off just complicates things.
[quote comment="130720"]Nolawi,
That’s only a temporary solution, or not a solution at all. avoiding facing it never helps, i say deal with it, and talk as in really TALK. and you’e the only one who can be the judge of how to handle the whole situation wondata, but from a bit of experience… putting it off just complicates things.[/quote]
I disagree that is a permanent solutions… once he gets away from her… he will forget about her…
[quote comment="130606"]comment 20 & 15 is crazy .. this girl gets his attention and love without reciprocating it…
he should stay away from her till he gets over her…[/quote]
Sometimes, “crazy” works!!
Yo, forget friendship…it is too late for u even if that is what she genuinely wants which I doubt very much…..who knows may be she is looking for a worshiper….u don’t want be that bro….some girls are addicted to attention….am not saying that is the case here but u make the judgement….but the way I see it u may be too much in love to see these things….
Stay away man. When u do, one of two things will happen. She will either call u looking for love or the friendship will end. Both ways things will have a clear direction…..
is it just me or is the “term” ETHIOFUSED highly obnoxious..
slowly pull away. no need to talk, no need to give her a big head. just pull yourself out.
Is this a joke? It reads more like sex advice then one for the F zone.
I am going through the same issue with my X. I broke up with my x two years a go, some how we start dating again for about two month. At that time I did work hard to keep our relationship going, some how my effort didn’t work to my favor. To this day it kills me why we are not together, I keep asking her to get back said sorry for my wrong doing but she keep saying no to me. Here is the problem she is kind of stubborn she doesn’t want to say sorry no matter what. One of the conditions I put for us to get back is for her to accept her mistake and try to work on it together but she want admit her wrong doing.
All I am telling you is hang in their, you will be ok, what I did to get of her is exercising every day; it looks like it is kind of working for me. Write know I can’t skip a day with out exercising I also feel good about my self I am getting my self ready to date again yes I still did think about her but not so often like I used to
[quote comment="131552"]I am going through the same issue with my X. I broke up with my x two years a go, some how we start dating again for about two month. At that time I did work hard to keep our relationship going, some how my effort didn’t work to my favor. To this day it kills me why we are not together, I keep asking her to get back said sorry for my wrong doing but she keep saying no to me. Here is the problem she is kind of stubborn she doesn’t want to say sorry no matter what. One of the conditions I put for us to get back is for her to accept her mistake and try to work on it together but she want admit her wrong doing.
All I am telling you is hang in their, you will be ok, what I did to get of her is exercising every day; it looks like it is kind of working for me. Write know I can’t skip a day with out exercising I also feel good about my self I am getting my self ready to date again yes I still did think about her but not so often like I used to[/quote]
what did you do wrong? did you cheat?
nolawit I didn’t cheat it is a bit complicated if you want the detail I will let you know I am about to go to work know. I will promise you cheating is not involved from both side
I recently started dating a person I kept in the F Zone for 3 years. He was persistent- I think that paid off. I am not advising anything here…just sharing my experience.
saba,
if you don’t like him or have no feelings for him in the first place, why change after 3 years …? it appears that you were either unsure all along or felt sorry for the dude in the end.
from a Tragically Funny Bernos blog:
I was in disbelief, I was shocked, I was jovial, I was ecstatic and I thought I could start living again. I wanted to be sure as the sound was muffled by the surround system of Neway Debebe’s Yayne Abebe Nesh vocals.
Saba
Congratulations for upgrading your friendship into a relationship. Not sure how the friendship was like between you and him during the past 3 years, but to me it sounds that you made him work hard to get you. And now you are saying his persistence has paid off.
May be if you reveal more information, I will give you the benefit of the doubt. If you say you were friends for 3 years, what made you change your mind now? Did you know that he was interested in more than a friendship with you back then? I mean I just feel sorry for a guy who works for 3 years, imagine that is THREE YEARS to get a gal.
Or, like Wudenesh said above # 15 “I know of a friend who turned her friend down….and decided to give him a chance after a year (mind you, it was after she got hurt by her ex and thought ‘why not give a nice person a chance’ ) – is that you?
If it was just a good friendship that has just got upgraded into a relationship, then I don’t have any problem with that. But, if one is working hard and the other is playing hard to get, and is simultaneously playing the “friendship” card, I think that is just unacceptable.
Well, I think it’s not upgrading. After saying no to someone for 3 years you find out,
“I am getting older”
“The grass is not greener on the other side…”
well then you say “can’t do better than this”.
MY Abesha people always say “Merach yewedkal kemeratch” something like this…..
N’est pas SABA???? Can’t do better than this.
Well a guy who beggs for 3 years has to be desperate …..
[quote comment="134040"]Well a guy who beggs for 3 years has to be desperate …..[/quote]
well i can’t say desperate actually he knows what he wants. You just have to love and respect this kinda man..for the rest of your life…..
This is kinda off topic so I apologize from the start. I need advice. What do you do when find yourself falling for someone who is not appropriate? He could be your boss, your professor, your brother in law, your best friend’s man, he is married, he is way too young for you, he has a girlfriend, etc… Just pick one. I am in one of these situations. I can’t stop thinking about him. I don’t know what to do about it. He is such a great guy but he is off limits. I have to see him all the time so staying away from him is out of the question. So what is your advice? How do you “un-like” someone? I need to nip this thing in the bud before it gets too messy.
helen,
you sound like my secret admirer… or are you? i hope u don’t end up being stalker
…….let it go…?
why nobody told me about soj..is in town….???? we need to blog about your trip to addis. …
Justme,
I didn’t know u had crush on Soj….u should have told me. Too late…
[quote comment="134050"]This is kinda off topic so I apologize from the start.
I need advice. What do you do when find yourself falling for someone who is not appropriate? He could be your boss, your professor, your brother in law, your best friend’s man, he is married, he is way too young for you, he has a girlfriend, etc… Just pick one. I am in one of these situations. I can’t stop thinking about him. I don’t know what to do about it. He is such a great guy but he is off limits. I have to see him all the time so staying away from him is out of the question. So what is your advice? How do you “un-like” someone? I need to nip this thing in the bud before it gets too messy.[/quote]
You know Helen, I have been thinking about this for a while. what is it that makes married ppl off limits. Is it something like ‘I saw him/her first ‘ sort of thing.you know, ”finders keepers loosers ….” kind. I mean just because You are married does that stop you from having feelings for another person?
I hate being distrustful but I also hate the idea of getting stuck with someone just because you had feelings for them once up on a time and its supposed to be for life.My favorite singer of all times -Sting ,met his wife while she was married. She got divorced and married him.they have been together for over 20 sth years.
So for real,I don’t know wht to tell you.Gin there is really sth wrong with marriage and off limits. So much for being helpful right ?:)
Winta
If you are attracted to a man who is not single the best thing to do is to turn away from this temptetion. It is normal to be tempted Even Jesus Christ was tempted by the Devil while He was fasting for 40 days in the wilderness but He used the word of God to defit Satan. Satan is the temptor he lies and deceives people. That is all he does. But do not fall into that use the name of Jesus to fight your temptetion.
By any chance if you are attracted to a married man. Run for your life. Do whatever you have to do to not fall into a love triangle. This is what the Holy Bible says on the subject “But from the beginning of creation, God MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE. 7 “FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER, 8 AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH; so they are no longer two, but one flesh. 9 “What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate. Mark 10: 6-9 (NIV)”
As the saying goes What goes around comes around ( some times it comes sooner than we think. It’s also said we reap what we saw.
So Winta my advise is to do the Right thing
Be strong and self controlled.
May Love and Peace fill your heart!
The above is for Helen
Please, give me a break on the religous rethoric.
and if you can just reason out why or why not.
yeah ,i know the above is meant for Helen.
[quote comment="134050"]This is kinda off topic so I apologize from the start.
I need advice. What do you do when find yourself falling for someone who is not appropriate? He could be your boss, your professor, your brother in law, your best friend’s man, he is married, he is way too young for you, he has a girlfriend, etc… Just pick one. I am in one of these situations. I can’t stop thinking about him. I don’t know what to do about it. He is such a great guy but he is off limits. I have to see him all the time so staying away from him is out of the question. So what is your advice? How do you “un-like” someone? I need to nip this thing in the bud before it gets too messy.[/quote]
He is your boss if you have to see him everyday. And he is probably married since you consider him off limit. I see he also likes you othewise how would the situation get messy? In your book, guys like that are considered great? Whats great about the guy who is about to cheat on his wife? And probably will forever keep doing so because he has unresolved issues.
How do I do for instant ‘unlike’ the guy.
You could also try to get a BF, the next single guy to hit on u will do, fat, ugly, hair, no-hair.. anything that wont make you feel guilty after the fact.
, the truth 
If you do have a BF, you should tell him you cheated on him
winta,
He is off limits because he is taken. As much as I want it to be different that is the reality.
Genfo,
Not into religion, but I know I have to get away from the situation.
Anon,
What to do when you find yourself constantly thinking, dreaming and fantasizing about the person you believe is THE ONE but for fate you just can’t have him. The mess I was talking about is me falling even deeper for him, not cheating. I have to find a way to get over it.
Hi Helen,
Everyone is this group seems a bit forbidden fruit like.
I dont know what to advice you, as you mentioned un-liking someone doesnt work, well in that case you could either foresee what will happen and flee especially if they are married and might get sacked by their spouse and a family breakdown and mayhem ensues or professors who can be kicked out of their jobs if they cannodle with their students and they get caught abusing of the position of trust and responsablity they hold , the boss at work too might bad news , if you break up with him or have a lovers tiff wouldnt the atmosphere at work be unbearably tense? or, you could do what you wish and take the consequences and consult hindsight when things go pear shaped…brother in laws and best friend BF or husband should be a no no I think, but that is only me .
The only one safe with no attachment seems to be the way too young guy…if none of these guys are not the love of your life ask yourself are they worth the hassle of a lot of people getting hurt in the process…
LMAO this is the best advice yet.
What’s love got to do with this? i been there my AFrican/East-African/Ethiopian friend, this is just obsossion, the more you think about her the worest it gets…ofcours till she lets you deep…..but who am i to say its not love? you are the one who is in that shoes~
,waw sorry helen she is my doent . tatch hem
endalc, nice to see you are back. I also see anon and bez, but where is hidaya? I miss that girl from England. Hope she wasn’t traded to spain along with ronaldo
Hidaya, come back.
datdude wrote:
Oh but look who is back? datdude my old mate I have missed you too nice to see you back yeah:)… if only,about the legs though”sigh” …
If only I had skilled in football legs costing 80 millions wouldnt mind if I was sold to the end of the world, I shy away to mention any country in the world incase anyone get cross with me about it lol…Bruno aka comedian Sacha Cohen has just upset the Ambassador of Austria ith his latest film and guarantedd to upset lots more just like Borat did to everyone..so since I havent got his clout, money or lawyers I best not follow his example, but it is good Ronaldo is gone..good for Arsenal especially, lol we dont want Man United to be all invincible…btw this musketeer has been wearied by life and stuff but will show up from time to time…
Selam to other musketeers Bez and Anonx..halla guys:)
well bruh,I really relate to your story on so many levels but hey I think itz about time that you gave it up, fo real! I was in the same situation and my friends used to tease me about it. It took me so long chasing her; they named it Litigation instead of courtship!!! so just quit that thing and get on with your life!!As they say it takes two to eskesta! Run Wondata!
@ Hidaya:
welcome back…it is always fun to read what you have to say. Have I mentioned we have opening in the liverpool fan club, this may be your chance to escape the what must be an agonizing affair watching arsenal?
do you recommend watching bruno? still haven’t watched it.
@Datdude…
Hei fellow musketeer sorry for being late with this reply:)…
Sacha Cohen’s Bruno is funny, It is only been out for a week here I havent seen it yet but read somewhere that though it is a funny movie Bruno is not as sharp as Borat or Ali G characters were or as likeable…I am inclined to agree I cant seem to warm up to the character at all even after seeing Sacha Cohen in character all over the place this past week and thhe week before…instead i went to see Angels and Demons and a weepie about a dying child and the morality in creating a sibling to save it uhmm arent I just a barrel of fun? lol…
@ Hidaya:
k, so that is a yes for bruno, and a definitely no for that cameron diaz movie. I just don’t have it in me to take on a fictional depression, the world has enough suffering to self flagellate myself on cue from the silver screen. The scary thing is I don’t think we are far from organ farming, and hopefully that will be the end of it, unless organ farming means breeding kids for the unthinkable. Where does that put us in comparison to the ancient mayans and their human sacrifice? As you might guess, the nuns wouldn’t approve…lets hope these scenarios are relegated to fiction in our lifetimes.
Hei datdude…
“I just don’t have it in me to take on a fictional depression, the world has enough suffering to self flagellate myself on cue from the silver screen.”
Self flage-what? *puzzled*
Ok, it is not Ben Hur I have been watching, never did watch it infact ,that I know would cause me some celluloid induced self flage something or self walloping the back of my own head as I would call it I am sure lol…
Actually it is not about that nor is it depressing..it is a well made morality tale of the times…
I like morality tales, they made me think what if? and reflect if I was caught up in the “what if issue myself ” what I would do and the choices I would make…
This one is not that far fetched either, there are at least three children in the UK who were in the news at some point because of their genetic incurable illness and one couple even had a baby so they could save the first baby with their bone marrow or some other stuff…and there is an ongoing debate about it as between scientist and objectors to the idea and moral people..I am a listener and not totally close minded to it nor I am open minded about it come to think of it. I just sit on the fence and listen, read it and watch movies about it, then sit of the fence, that is me aye…
Uhmm there is lots in modern life that the nuns would not approve of musketeer datdude:) why is this one any different?.. is it because this one involves the creation of life?…I dont have much agaisnt creating life to save life, bone marrow, stem cells, bring them all on I’d say…
what I am sitting on the fence about is the perspective of the child donor who didnt ask to be born yet expected to comply to wishes of others that they didnt exactly consent to..it is that perpective that keeps me on the fence…for now, that was what this movie was about…
Hidaya wrote:
Well pretty much this is different in my view in that it involves life that is defenseless. Well, people can be defenseless at different points and circumstances, but the unborn yet fertilized are the definition of a clean slate, defenseless, innocent etc…BAHHHHH I can’t make an objective, conclusive case for why I think this way about this Hidaya. I just do
and very strongly about it. If I tried to give you hogwash about why i’m right it would be an insult to your great intellect, but suffice to say i’m very firmly with the nuns on this one. I’m all for trying to save the living (who might have diseases etc..) but not at the cost of research on rhesus monkeys, negro members of the US army, or in our day on the unborn. 
I know terrible thing to say to someone dying of a terrible disease or Michael J. Fox. Still I think living is worthwhile not because of our circumstances, but how we respond to it. And we shouldn’t lose balance in our search for cures, sort of like S. Africans raping virgins as cure for AIDS. Plus the unborn aren’t getting a chance to star in the tragic yet beautiful play of life. Some things are sacred cause I said so, and the nuns 
. Seriously though, this is some depressing stuff…how about a Borat joke
in my country they’d go crazy for those two, her not so much lol
cheers mate.
Hidaya and dadude back? thumbs up! I’ve seen bez lurking too…
@ Anonx:
why can’t I be lurking like bez? why must I simply be back? Mr. AnoX yes with no N, j/k I know its AnonX, just like its daTdude, not dAdude. Anyway, I want it to be known I can lurk, watch me lurk the next few days and you’ll take back what you said.
Oh Aye I only went away for five minutes to have the most trying day, upon coming back datdude wants the title of Lurker the 1st to go to him and not Bezzie Bez who is doing more lurking at present lol, he promised fellow musketereer Anonx to watch him demostrate how to be wordl class lurker in the coming days….
Two thumbs up Anonx is back, he is not competing for the lurker title so far, Bezzie is, in absentia, poor sod lol…what else? yey nicks..there is beef about that too with N’s and T’s mssing lol…uhhhm musketeers , unless either of your fictional or real names have been likened to a city far far away with no connection to your name whatsoever you havent known the pain in suffering from thrashed name syndrome and my complaints about it are more valid than yous twos lol, this is all a joke guys incase the intended humour gets lost in the translation.. what else?…datdude I shall come back for the more serious stuff later…datdudey and Anonina ,see I have murdered both your nicks:)even more, ooops dont sen me to the tower lol…
@Datdude…
Jagshemash mate:)my favourite Borat saying…yeah the poor woman’s face lol….you dont wanna hear of my favourite Borat joke, it is unrepeatable, it’s the one where metaphor and real stuff was all mixed up, then lost in translation as to which was on sale and which wasnt lol…
I am not that far off from your thinking about the rights of the unborn donor, not sure of the nuns though there is a lot they dont arove of lol…seriously though there is no going away that a decision was made about a being that was not consulted to be a guinea pig for lack of a better word for the primary benefit of others and their rights as to whether they want to lose a kidney, give bone marrow or whatever else, these are all invasive and painful procedures that every human should being decide whether they want to go through it or not and not have it imposed on them even by their family…
I do get that point and the protection the child donor need which is primarily why I remain perched on my fence, that, and the fact that moral issues like this takes too much thinking datdudey…who knows where it might all lead to? I am not risking it lol…
I am ok with research to cure disease ,but dubious of animal research, or experimental research just for scientific urposes only whatever anyone says some of it is absolutelty barbaric and want no experimental stuff on humans unless they are sound of mind ,consent to it ,are privy to what the reserch involves and take a well informed decision whether or not to take part in it…
The SA thing I read it , pff it is more awful than awful but not as clear cut, yes there is the practice of sexually abusing female children with the beleif it will cure AIDS, but research conducted in SA about sexual violence where a variety of men of different age groups were surveyed very recently maybe less than a month, the results seems to indicate a sexually violent society where rape and sexual violence agaisnt women is almost common place and tolerated and in some places encouraged…I will get you the link to the results of the research…they are shocking…
I am reading about research on cells latetly…will take me a while to understand first the science of it and then the ethics involved…enjoy the weekend datdudey
…
@ Hidaya:
jagshemash, you know fences are not the best places to be remember the berlin wall, or the maginot line? or great wall of china. All failed to reward the trust entrusted upon them by the builders (and perchers i guess lol)
I look forward to see how your views might change one way or another after reading on cells…I leave you with a borat line that I think is simply brilliant, well two:
“we support your war of terror” to which the texas crowd applauds
“may George bush drink the blood of every man, woman and child” brilliant, although that could be construed as well wishing in certain languages lol
@Datdude
Dudey I was only perched on a metaphorical fence,now you threaten me becoming part of the debris of all those walls that collapsed,…ha *mock indignation*, it’s got me thinking that if I was a bird I could observe stuff humans do from above and when the whatsits hits the fan ie walls, quick flying exit for the innocent bystanding little bird me lol …
Jokes aside I am not really a fence sitter or maybe just a little when it is something I am not fully informed about, like this business of creating babies from egg shells, sperm made of God knows what cucumbers even sandals maybe? j/k ,but yo get the drift …we have now been told sperm can be made without the presence of men contribution..so then the liberal in me which is majority of me gets into a bloody fight with the conservative voice within, it is not yet a strong voice yet but I suspect it might be if I give it air time then I get pulled this way and that way..the fence is much peaceful dudey but i know it cant be for forever:)…
About Borat ,that was one of my best jokes too but I didnt have the guts to even bring it lol, second best is the one about the well and the Jew … Oh my God he made all those redneck sing along with him about Jewish people, and no one was even shocked …
I liked that he stitched them up good and proper for the entire world to see their bigotry…
what I cant get over is that no one really challenged him to stop at any point ,after all they didnt know they were being stitched up and were starring in a movie right? so for all they knew this was actually real to them and they were willing to indulge him yikes… and on similar note at the beginning of Borat and before the movie came out some people even thought that he was real..who on earth would think someone like Borat is real? or his description of Kazastan real?..probably the same bigots who sang along throw the Jew down the well will also beleive that in Kazastan all those vile things Borat mentions are actually real and people from there do them and are like him…
I bet they didnt even pick up a single book to read one page about Khazastan but are ready to accept what was said about Khazastan because of their inherent bigotry …
I want Sacha Cohen for PM, if nothing else it will be laugh a minute during the recession until every ambassador in every country in the world sues the PM for outraging them on way or another…night night dudey…
@ Hidaya:
hidaya, I don’t want to even think about where science is heading. I heard about the sperm with no male required, it seems we are missing the building blocks of society, man, woman + child . I would hope this is still a relevant structure. Somehow I feel like an aging robot about to be decommissioned for a newer toy. As you can tell i’m one who loves fences (not to sit on them
) as a source of boundaries, point me out to the nation with the most conservative laws on science, esp. biology that will be my next abode. nagshemash, chequi, high five, and all.
Unless of course sacha cohen somehow becomes PM, then i’m willing to sacrifice all these ideals to live under such a leader. lol I would guess he would be a great PM, in fact it amazes me how england has been cursed with major and blair two leaders I consider so inept for a country teeming with witty and intelligent sounding citizens lol I guess democracy works inversely in some places. I’d still take cohen, of course he’ll have to be in character hopefully borat, and I expect he will commission a new movie “cultural learning of america for great benefit of Britain” loool
I think nations should be run by comedians, then again maybe not. I’d hate to think someone is having a jolly good laugh while raising my income tax or sending me off to another war. Or then again why not, like newtons laws maybe joy is neither created nor lost, merely transferred. i dunno i’m on the fence on this one lol
@Datdude…
Hi dudey how is your day in the Land of the Free?
“I think nations should be run by comedians, then again maybe not. I’d hate to think someone is having a jolly good laugh while raising my income tax or sending me off to another war”
lo that is funny…dudey mate the beastly politicians alredy laugh at us daily, crush the economy, start wars and ublic unrest, the only difference would be Sacha as a PM or my other favourite funny man Eddie Izzard or maybe your John Stewart ( I love him , he is brilliant)as a president they would probably makes us laugh and amuse us even as they increases our taxes and start up wars….if they have the sense of humour to parody their own government even better, if I am being laughed at I know which I would choose…and it is worse than the times of Blair the warmonger PM to Major the innefective PM..we now have a man called Gordon Brown,no one seems to like him and that is mostly his own MP’s, I think with him Labour will lose at the next general election next year…
I certainly lost interest as soon as he came on..he is a man devoid of charisma and appeal or warmth, he is ackward looking even when he means well, unlike Blair who was slightly Messiaic style deranged especially about wars but he had charisma and had the ability to make you beleive in him even when you knew you shouldnt..he had the power of persuasion and made me like politics for the first time ever when he became PM..this one cant even get his own MP’s to like him, respect him or better still for politicans to fear him lol…
“Somehow I feel like an aging robot about to be decommissioned for a newer toy”
This is such a funny image, now you know how first time wives replaced by younger models marriage model that European men seem to prefer feel like lol…not sure how that is relevant to a non European man but never mind lol….but yeah soon mankind, like literaly mankind to the exclusion of women will be truly dispensable…
I still have not understood the need to create artificial sperm…what happened to the world male population sperm? is there shortage of it? does somebody know something we dont? no one really explains why this is needed….
“point me out to the nation with the most conservative laws on science, esp. biology that will be my next abode. nagshemash, chequi, high five, and all”
Dudey nowadays that is nowhere, as far as East Europe to Asia to South America to even Italy in Western Europe IVF scientists and people in the baby making business use science and technology to create babies with total disregard to ethics..I am not on the fence on that,lol ….
hidaya,
is it safe to say the song “its a maaaaaaan’s world” is outdated?
“but yeah soon mankind, like literaly mankind to the exclusion of women will be truly dispensable…”
lol you know this is funny even though its scary and likely true. The only solace I have is that women get seriously evil and catty when they are around each other in high concentrations to the exclusion of males. I’m not sure what the exact math is, but you know i’m right about this threshold when sanity and pacifism end.
I can rest peacefully at night knowing that soon after us men have been shelved and decommissioned (along with our sperms)and perhaps extinct, women will go at each other with furious madness. Little did the world know the male was what kept women distracted from self destruction. Ahhhh, yes sweet justice after all
you ask whats that sweet euphoric smell?
V-A-L-I-D-A-T-I-O-N lol maybe its a man’s world after all.
nighty night musketeer
@Datdude
Hey dudey, warm greetings and Jagshemash
…..did you envisage a world without men? *gasp*,& *shudder* wouldn’t that feel a bit like the end of the world ?..or maybe the end of one half of human kind? I don’t think it would a nice world, boring too …No dudey ,let your people be, even with your obvious flaws we don’t want you extinct or substituted for artificial sperm, the mad scientist are for the most part men so they don’t want you extinct either I am sure…..they are plotting something else which will probably benefit men in the long run… *I have my conspiracy theory cap on* lol….
“The only solace I have is that women get seriously evil and catty when they are around each other in high concentrations to the exclusion of males. I’m not sure what the exact math is, but you know i’m right about this threshold when sanity and pacifism end. ”
Popular belief and feminism says this only happens because of men divide rule and conquer stuff and the power men hold in society ,but if the main culprit is extinct what is there to compete about or be catty about? …or it could be really biological and then it will be hell on earth pffff lol…
Dudey you’re crowing too soon lol…women’s tendency is to be pragmatic, , to negotiate, to care and nurture and eventually to survive under the most difficult circumstances not self destruct, we are always saving or trying to those who want to self destruct and all, mainly men but a good number of those are women so no our natural instincts will probably win ahaha to you lol…
“is it safe to say the song “its a maaaaaaan’s world” is outdated?”
Not yet musketeer , the world hasnt changed that much lol….
“you ask whats that sweet euphoric smell?
V-A-L-I-D-A-T-I-O-N lol maybe its a man’s world after all”
Indeed
as it is always been…nighty night dudey 
….
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